Sunday, October 4, 2009

Change you can Believe in!

As the Cubs’ season has now spiraled towards a point of mathematical irrelevance, I can’t help but think towards the future (as any respectable Cubs fan would do). Though the popular (and well justified) theme of choice for many fans is player changes, I personally believe that it is high time for an almost complete coaching overhaul... that means Lou and all the rest of them.

Now I know that Sweet Lou has another year on his contract, but for the love of Santo just buy it out and send him on his way to Boca-Raton with all the other old, overweight Italians. Seriously, trade Milton Bradley and use the money saved to pay off the debt incurred from purging this organization of Pinella.

As far as replacements go, there are a number of tantalizing choices to take the helm. It’s obvious that Bob Brenly is pinning for another coaching position as he actively pursued the opening in Milwaukee last year and continues to offer countless suggestions and criticisms throughout most broadcasts (the kind of stuff that got Stoney fired). On the other hand, Ryan Sandberg is slowly working his way up the organization latter and looks poised to have a Major League position soon. Finally, there is Joe Girardi who was ignorantly passed over two years ago in favor of a much more sloth-like Italian.

So without further ado I give you my personal dream Cubs Coaching Lineup:

Head Coach: Joe Girardi – Although he had a rough start with the Yankees, he has quickly adjusted to the NYC spotlight and has them gunning for another championship. Also, lets not forget his borderline genius work with the Marlins as a rookie head coach.

Hitting Coach: Ryan Sandberg – He may be the eventual head coach but could defiantly use a little more experience in the majors and may also act as a stimulus to the Cubs woeful bats. (Von Joshua gets an honorable mention purely for his name).

Bench Coach: Jim Riggleman – This choice should speak for itself as Riggleman has consistently made sub-par teams produce beyond their capabilities. Please reference my previous article on Riggleman for further justification.

Pitching Coach/Color Commentator: Steve Stone – Losing Stoney to ESPN and then the White Sox is one of the greatest travesties that this organization has ever thrown upon itself and it is time to rectify that decision (why Kent Murker and Dusty had more sway than Stone is beyond me). As unpopular as it would be to fire Rothschild after the Cubs starters have performed so well, I truly believe it is time for some new coaching blood. Additionaly, think how nice it would be to have Stone do a few innings of radio and TV while on the field... magical!

Bullpen Coach: Turk Wendal – Seriously, who else can boast the civilian air speed record, wears a necklace made of lions/sharks teeth that he personally extracted and has a stockpile of amusing superstitions that might just get us over the hump.

Third Base Coach: Wavin’ Wendell Kim – It’s time to bring someone with an aggressive spirit back to third base. Though, at times, the tendency to wave until you fall over may leave some less speedy cubs (Big Z) trapped half-way between third base and certain doom; it really does add a nice comical spark to the game.

Defense/Base Running Coach: Bob Brenly – Now I understand that this may be a risky choice as his head coaching aspirations could potential cause managerial clubhouse troubles and alsmost certain usurping, but my heart says that Bob would provide that crotchety old man flavor that we need, while still making Girardi aware that one little slip up could mean that BB is back on the thrown. Plus I’m sure all the players will love to hear his stories about coaching the Diamondbacks to the World Serious... I know I do.

First Base Coach: Don Zimmer – This one is a no-brainer. Tons of coaching experience, limited mobility, history with the organization and is perfect in a bench clearing situation.

Let the World Series run begin!!!!

1 comment:

  1. Zimmer is definitely the muscle of the coaching staff. I wonder what Turk Wendal is doing now.


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